Salon Rising: The Podcast-sharelle

Summary

She's back in the Inner Sanctum lovers!! Salon Rising The Podcast had its first return guest. We were so excited to welcome back Sharelle to recap her journey with her business. We're so lucky that Sharelle has been so open about her tax debt and her business journey. We recapped Sharelle's story and see how far she's come. And babes, it's huge!! But also, we know when Sharelle comes to visit we are all going to get raw and real. So of course we delve into the importance of mindset, vulnerability, and honesty. We also touch on personal growth with therapy. Leadership evolution, and navigating staff changes. And reflecting on how past traumas influence current achievements. It's an episode that has it all!!

00:00 Welcome to the Inner Sanctum

00:13 Introducing Our Special Guest: Sherelle

00:29 Reflecting on Past Episodes

00:46 Sherelle's Business Journey

02:11 The Tax Debt Struggle

09:07 Strategies for Financial Management

12:08 Mindset and Personal Growth

21:00 The Importance of Vulnerability

26:42 Dealing with Change and Letting Go

29:26 Emotional Detachment and Self-Reflection

30:10 Grace in Leadership

30:54 Handling Client Departures

31:39 Personal Reflections and Challenges

33:55 Integrity in Business Transitions

36:04 Navigating Business and Personal Growth

51:29 The Importance of Therapy

56:32 Facing Personal and Business Challenges

01:01:52 Finding Inspiration and Support

01:02:59 Conclusion and Future Plans

Transcript

 Welcome back

to the Inner Sanctum, Salon Rising, the podcast, otherwise known as Samara's therapy session. Welcome. Welcome. Welcome back. Uh, we're joined by a special guest today. Samara. First time, second visitor. Yeah, that's right. I don't know that it is. It's the first time we've had someone on twice. It is.

Oh, yeah. Correct.

Yeah. Episode four. Feel like we could have said it in an easier way, but that is correct. Sure. It still works. What? Okay. Sorry. This is a second time visitor. Long time listener. Yeah.

Yeah,

she back

every episode listener,

every episode I

add. Okay. So

we should probably introduce you. Sherelle is in the

house.

Hey guys,

back.

How are

you? How long has it been? Like 12 months? Yeah, no, it has been, has it really been

12

months?

You know what? I just went on the bare face and naked podcast and it had been two years. Cause I see you guys all the time. All the time. So I feel like it's been longer than

when do we start the pod?

No, it was probably just over two years, just over a year ago. Yeah. It's

just over a year ago. Yeah.

We should like take clips and be like before and afters. This is where she was at. This is where she did that. I mean, we were really lucky

when Cheryl came on last time because. She was super raw and open and honest about some of her business journey, which I think really laid that foundation for allowing people to be vulnerable when they came on.

Yeah. Um, we're going to do that all over again. Yeah. It'll

get deep.

So do you want to recap a little on, okay. So Shirelle is the owner of Miss Lash, the studio. Um, she also has Ms. Lash education and I feel like there's something else I'm missing.

No, you're probably thinking of Lash Aesthetics, but that's wrong.

Oh, okay. Yeah. Oh, see

whole growth.

Yeah. Whole growth journey. Yeah. Cause

we were doing the macro lens.

That's right. Oh my gosh. That's so right. Yeah. No, no more. No more. It was just too much stress, too much. Okay. No, we're going to go into that. Yeah. Sorry.

Okay. So obviously when we spoke last time, shit loads of debt that we were, we were working on getting through, um, we were working on bits of your business.

We, you were doing the macro lens and. You were bringing different things in. You had two different businesses. So we've really kind of simplified things. Cause you know, we got really focused on what was important and what was like, what was the easy thing? Where was the passion, not the easy, but where was the passion that laid in education?

It made sense a little bit more

on what was like, Yeah. Like easier because it was more passion that just grew into it instead of it. Why is it so hard? Why am I pulling myself so many different ways? Yeah. Yeah.

One of the big things that we spoke about, so let's get that out on air is you taxed it. Yes. Um, we were, when we started, we were like 180, 000, 180,

000 in tax debt.

And where are you now? Where are you?

Yeah. I know. I know so many people, the reason why I'm being so raw and honest about it is because everyone has like, not everyone has tax debt, but everyone pays that tax. And the more I started speaking about it, the more people were like, Oh my God, I'm going through the same thing.

And I'm like, okay, this is good because it's such a scary thing. And knowing that other people are feeling the same way

takes some of that

fear away. And one of the crazy things for me is I've got, um, a friend who had a massive tax debt, cleared it, and now has a tax debt again, because they didn't learn from, you know, It, the first time it didn't know how to do it, didn't know how to do business, couldn't understand the differences in things, didn't know how to like set it up.

So now I'm like working them through how to actually get through it and how to learn from it. And then like, yeah, it's not like, cause

if you don't, again,

it's not like you're going to pay this tax off and be like, cool. Now I'm just going to leave. I'm done. Bye. It's now like the set up from here and you have been paying a substantial amount, like an additional two and a half thousand dollars a week in tax payments, which is huge.

It's

actually, it's normal for me now. I feel like it's like, yep, that's just what it is. I've gotten myself into the mindset of like, okay, this is what it is. You have to just keep going. And then I feel like I'm going to be rich as,

oh my God, in a couple of months time, you're going to be like a baller.

So can we, can we ask

where it's at?

I think we're at so personal. So I had three to give everyone kind of a breakdown. We had three, I had a personal tax debt, another personal tax debt, and then a business tax debt. Right. So

when people are unsure of what this means, I'm going to break it down a little bit. A personal tax debt is money that you've taken from your business and then you have to pay tax on it.

Yeah. So for example, if you worked for me or Shirelle, you would get. We would pay you and then we would pay your tax onwards. What happens is, is people forget that every, every dollar that they take inside their business is taxable. So if they're not putting money away from, for the money, for the income that they're giving to themselves, and it can be them paying themselves a certain amount or every time you guys whip a hundred dollars or 500 or a thousand dollars or out of your business for yourself.

Or, you know, I'm going to spend two grand on this for myself, but I'll take it out of my business. All of that is taxable income for yourself. So when Sherelle saying I have personal tax, it was her taking from the business and not putting the tax aside on that amount that she was taking.

Yeah. And I also didn't have any, like I didn't have any accounts set up, so I was just having one account just taking, as I please, I'd pay my rent, I'd pay my fuel, I'd pay my hair, I'd pay my nails, I'd pay everything out of this one account.

I actually had no idea what I was doing. And I was just kind of going as I pleased and making money. I would bring in money. I wouldn't put aside any money. I just pay my rent out of kind of everyone, like one, Account. Yeah. Yeah. So I had the two personal, so they're paid off now, so I can't actually remember.

How much the personal together was, I need to go back and have a look and we can celebrate. Um, but that's completely gone. It's so nice to see zero zero and zero zero on my other one. I'm like, love it. So we've got that done. And then we're down to 30, 000 on my business one. Oh

my goodness.

That's it.

Oh

my goodness.

Yeah. That is huge.

Cheryl and I talk about it all the time. So we're kind of like conditioned to it.

But yeah, I feel like, right. I feel like 30 for me, I'm like, Oh my God, 30 is still so much, but looking at it in the big, she says 30 to me. And I'm like,

dude, that's like, cause a little while ago I was like, Oh, I'm just exhausted by this.

And I was like, babe, it is the last kilometer in a marathon. We're so close. I understand you being so tired. It has been a big journey that you've been on. And now it is time to actually like, Put it up, be able to see it, mark it off each week. I need

that visual as well to be like, okay, this is where you're at.

Come on, keep going. It's like a little extra push. But yeah, so 30, so I'm not celebrating yet. I was going to celebrate when I had paid off my two other taxes, but I was like, no, I'll just wait until everything is paid off and then I can really like zero on everything. Yeah. Yeah. Like really, really get like that celebration.

Be like, fuck you. Bye.

Yeah. Cheryl and I are just going to scream for like 45 minutes. I said to

the girls, let's have a party. I think

we need to definitely should have a party. Something needs

to happen because bloody hell, this has been a big, big journey. In there, like, every single day, like, I would say to my partner, oh, and he, I would be like, babe, I just feel like I'm not working.

For anything, even though I am, and this money is going out of my account, but I'm like, I just feel like I'm working so hard and I, but I think, cause I'm not saying that what's paid off is

your lessons. You have learned so fucking much, like so much over these and it's not even been two years. It's like 18 months, less than 18 months.

Yeah. It's wild. And you're going to look back and be like, holy crap, I'm proud of myself. So yes, I think to anyone that's listening to this is new in business. If you don't want to get to the point where you are feeling like you are working for nothing, you have to be putting in the work now. And if you are slightly there, if you're like, this is building and I don't know how to get out of it.

You need to find someone now.

Yeah.

I can be that person, but you've need to find someone now that can teach you it because you're going to keep getting deeper as well. Yeah.

Like niche it down. Like I need you down until tax. Yes. Like I didn't even think about growing my salon. I just thought about tax. I was like, I just need to pay this goddamn tax off.

So, but you helped me also do that. You helped me grow my business. My business was making more than it had ever made with only two staff, like me and my other staff. Yeah. Then in the past where I'd have five staff and I'm like, what, this is insane. So even just a few changes that we made, but the one question that I want to ask you and that I think a lot of people would benefit from is how do we do it?

Like a lot of people go, okay, I understand that you paid off your tax and you did this, but what strategies do we put in place?

So for us, it was dedicating you a week. Wage for sure. So we, um, got your personal number. When I say wage, when you are only

listening and not watching, she's doing the little quotation marks

when I say wage like that, when you work for yourself and it's not such a company, you don't pay yourself so much a wage.

Technically it's not

called

a wage, but it's paying yourself as if you are being paid a wage so that you know, okay. Cause this is a big thing. We speak about it, um, on. When we do our finances program, if you're paying yourself 1, 000 a week, so say you're like, I need to take 1, 000 a week. It's not 1, 000 a week.

Correct. There is a taxable amount that's on that. We worked out. So if you need 1, 000 a week in to be paid, you actually need to pay. Earn more. So if you look at the tax calculators online, it's about, and don't take me 'cause it changes. Yeah, it changes depending on your circumstances. But you can go onto the a TO portal and go, what would it be?

Yeah, it's about 200 and the one basic one is about two 50. Yeah. 200. Um two. No, it's two 50. It's about 249 to be exact when I do it over my calculations, Jennifer. It's about 250 if there's no student loans and things like that. It depends on kids and depends on health care and all of that sort of thing.

So that's, you know, 1, 250 just with that. And then once you work in sick pay, holiday pay and super. We worked out, it came to about 1, 550.

And can we just remember that those things are really important, guys? Really, really should

be your number one. Cause shit, you will end up in 200 K. Yeah,

that is number one.

So we worked out what you needed is wage. And we went minimal because we were like, we have a big tax debt. So we worked out what you needed to take and how to put your future tax away. We worked out. We worked out what your future GST amount would be as well. And also your pay as you go. So no, you're already in business.

We already knew what that looked like. And we checked in, we changed accountants. Yes. We checked in a lot with your new accountants and we really worked together so that everybody felt comfortable with that. So the first thing that we did was actually work out what your future tax would be. Cause. You can't steal from Peter to pay Paul.

So you can't be paying your past tax and not putting your future tax debt. So otherwise you'll get another bill and then you'll be like, holy shit, that's on top. And then it's just, and then you're just that little circle on that wheel. Yeah. And so you got really good at, okay, so I'm paying this exorbitant amount of tax every week.

Can I just add to

that as well? The one thing that I really had to get my mindset on, I had to come to terms with how much I actually needed to pay back. Cause a lot of the time I'd just be like, I don't know. I don't know how much I owe and I would like literally block it out and I would just be like, I don't even know.

I don't want to know because I was so scared. So I think the first step for me was actually getting

full radical fucking acceptance.

Like you'd look at that number and you go, well, shit. This is not going anywhere. I'm like, do not

put your head under the sand. Tell me what your credit card debt is. Tell me what your tax debt is, every single debt you have.

I want to say nothing scares me.

And you have to, because otherwise if you hide it, the only person you're fooling is yourself because it's not going to get paid off and yeah.

And I think at this point it's very heads under the covers. Like, I don't want to fucking deal with this. This is too much, too full on.

I don't, I just want to pretend none of it's happening. It's the first step is exactly. The first step is complete acceptance of where this is where I'm at. And I'm going to take full fucking radical responsibility for my shit. I got here, but the coolest bit about that is now you get out, whereas while your head is still under, you aren't going to be able to get out.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah.

So that was like the biggest thing for me. And then the other thing for me was mindset.

Yeah.

This is not your money anymore. Like at all. Nothing.

Never was

it. It is not.

Yeah. And I think the other thing that comes with that is the fact that. There will be debts that come from all different places.

You can't, you know, you can't be putting stuff on your credit card and paying off your tax debt. It's all debt. So like, let's get debt free rather than debts being different places. So the other thing we did too, then was, so we first worked that out. We worked out what your taxes looked like, put all your future stuff away.

And then we really worked on what the seller actually could be making. And again, a lot of it is mindset. We, you've come to me many a times and been like, Oh, I don't want to do this anymore. And I'm like, I know, let's get you into a mindset again and let's go. And once you're ready, you're like, okay, I'm good.

It's honestly the mindset. Hey, like

the more that you think good, the better. Like it's just, if you think bad, then obviously. So much bad is going to come.

Exactly.

But

mindset is

so powerful. Cheryl's

also been smart enough over the times to pick up different things that she felt passionate about. So the macro lens you picked up and then we were able to pay off chunks of different things with that.

And then the, and then your education, which you feel really passionate about. So it's not just a, I'm doing this for financial. It's such a passion piece for you. Yeah.

I think this one's the next biggest, like.

Yeah. For you. For me. Yeah.

I feel like this is like, yes, the money will come with it and it'll help me along this tax journey.

But oh my goodness, it's my, I love it,

which is why we started removing other things. So which is why we were like, that's not the direction that feels right when we came to the, like, you love doing the macro lens, but it's like, yeah, let's get a little bit clearer with everything of where we're actually going

and

going, okay, you know, no, that's not.

And I think the really important thing is to try this shit, right? Cause you were, when we met, you were really passionate about that, but then as you did it, you were like, This doesn't feel really aligned anymore. I don't like, and I was the same way. That's okay. Yes. That is okay. I did the same thing with education.

Like I really wanted to be an educator. And I started traveling and I was like, this is bulls. I don't want to sleep in a hotel somewhere and work all day and flying in at night and be exhausted. Like this doesn't align at all. And I was like, okay, cool. I tried that and it's just, I did it for a little while and it doesn't actually align.

I know that it's not right for me in that capacity. And really what I was searching for is what's Alan Rising gives me. Yeah. You know, so I think that's really important to, um, so yeah, with 30, 000 off and then remember that two and a half thousand dollars, then that is so trail still getting taxed on that two and a half thousand dollars that she's been paying a week because it's income still coming into her business.

But that now two and a half thousand dollars is going to be for her business and for her, which is

reinvested.

Fucking huge.

I know. I'm so excited. I feel like I can just do so much more with it now. I

think too, it's really normal to get to this stage of your journey and just have that fatigue. Yeah. Like that just fatigue.

Cause you've been going for so long. Like Samara was saying, like it's that last kilometer of a marathon. So it's just in those moments being like. Of course you feel like this. Mm, this has been a journey. It's okay. .

And I think it's really important too, 'cause people I think look at your journey and our journey together and they go, how do I do this quick?

You can't, it's not a quick thing. It's, let me tell you that for free right now. Yeah. And everyone goes, how do I? And they wanna learn from me and they wanna learn and they, but they want it done. I'm like that, like, and you are such, such a, have to learn this beautiful poster child of that have also, it doesn't get done quickly.

It is slowly. And shortly, you got into this mess slowly. You're going to get out slowly.

And can I add as well, you have to work hard on it. Like, it's not just like, like you said, a quick fix, but it's also not, it's not an overnight process, but you also have to put your head down and work so hard. And a lot of the time, I think that's why I've been putting my head down, but nothing's really showing for it.

And that's why I'm like, fuck, I feel like I'm not going anywhere, but I am like, I've gotten so far. It's why I need that like visual type of thing of like, okay, where are we where you're at? Cause it's not like a, yeah, you don't see it physically or like visually,

but the other thing is, and I think that's really important that you said, you know, you put your head down and you work hard because there's a lot of people that are like, cool, but can you just fix it for me?

Yes. And

that's just, you know, we had this, just, I spoke about this on the stories the other day. So we were talking a lot about, um, we've been talking about different things, letting go things, looking at things. Knowing your business better. And it was a, it was a story with my partner. So he came home the other night and he has gone from having apprentices to just him.

And he's so happy about it. Like being solo, he's like, Oh, this feels more aligned. I'm not having to work with other people and blah, blah, blah. So he's like, I'm going to cover, I'm going to cancel my work cover. So he messages his accountant and says like, I'm going to cancel my work cover. I don't need it anymore.

His accountant comes back and says, okay, it's going to be better for you to pay the last kind of thing. And rather than cancel it and get charged, it'll be 450. So he comes to me and he's like, okay, it's an extra 450 and I'm out of it. And I just went, that doesn't sound right. Yeah. And he was like, well, you know, and I was like, hold on, let's look into this.

And I said to him, what have they projected that your wages are going to be for last year? And he was like, I don't know, but has it all. So he's got it all. Yeah. He's so good with that. So I pulled it up and I was like, okay, they've projected that your wages were going to be 70, 000 and you had two apprentices.

And now you don't. And no, but even when you, when you have apprentices, you

get work

covers reduced as well. So his projected was 70, 000. His wages were only 20. Um, and so I respond, so I emailed like him, like, I'm confused as you know, you guys have projected 70, 000. You haven't included apprentices. And all I had was two apprentices and they responded 6am the next morning and said, Oh, you're absolutely right.

He's a two and a half thousand dollar refund. And I was like, you never would have seen that because you said to the accountants, take it.

I don't

understand it. And, or not, I understand it, but take it because it's a service you guys do. And we think that those people are doing the best for us. But if we don't know how to do it, And it's only because I have always done my work cover.

I didn't know it was an option that I was like,

something feels wrong here. It's the same with any of our services that we provide, right? Yeah. Different people have different skillsets, have different knowledge, have different life experience. So they, so the service that they provide, so the service that Cheryl provides when you go to her, the service that you and I provide when you come to us as opposed to someone else is going to be different just because someone has the label of being an accountant does not mean that they will have the same knowledge as the next person does not mean that they will look at things or deliver things in the same way.

And that's what's so important. What we've

said so many times is an accountant is not a fucking Mentor or a coach, they are, their job is not to tell you how to successfully run your business or how to do your taxes. Yeah,

exactly.

Their job is literally just to take the information and do their way of how they know how to do it.

Just like if you came to my salon to somebody else's, it's going to be different how it's going to be done. That's their job. So you've got to find someone that really aligns with you to what they're going to do. This was a massive game changer for me. I can't entrust my business and expect somebody external to look after it the way that I should be taking care of it because it's not their fucking business.

It's not their job. But it's also giving yourself that grace, right? To know that, okay, well. If there's information that you don't have and you don't know, then seek, you know, being comfortable to ask the questions, to find the person that's going to support you so that you do understand it.

I think too, there's been so much in this industry and I'm sure I will agree with me because we're so open about it now.

There's so much closed book. No one wants to see everybody's. Else's everyone's got shit going on, but they're like, I need to appear successful. I need to appear. And I get that from a business point of view, you don't want everybody knowing that your business is struggling. Because

remember when you and I first got together, I got together, I'm acting like we're in a relationship.

In July, it's,

you know,

I'm in, I'm in Europe in July. I'm sorry.

I'm in Europe in June.

We're getting married. I remember when. You looked at my Instagram and you said, this is not you. You need to take off all of this. And this is like, it was ego. It was ego. I used to have such a big ego and thinking like I would put this front up, like I'm so successful.

And like a part of me was successful, but the other part of me was like, I've got this massive, heavy debt that no one knows about that. If I bring it to the surface, I'm like, here I am thinking. So the ego

is trying to like. Overcompensate that and be like, no, but you're fine. And let's show everybody it's fine.

It's the same way in relationships. It's like, you know, it all looks great. My fucking mind did from the outside, but it was crumbling, but it's because we don't want to fail. We don't want to appear as failures. We don't want to, you know, we're trying so hard to keep it all together and it's not, it's nothing that's bad.

Like, I don't blame everyone, anyone for doing it. We've all done it. I've done it. Yeah. Um, but the minute that we became more open and you started sharing, you created this different, everyone loved it. Vibe of community and people seen and heard and like Yeah.

Relatability as well. And in like, if someone looks at this big business person that's doing so great and has no imperfections, they're gonna be like, well, I can't relate to her because here I am, like struggling or, you know, not doing as well.

I feel like I'm not doing as well. And then I would start to compare myself. Whereas if I have this big business lady that's up here and she's like, Oh my God, I've got these and I'm trying to work through these. I'd be like, Fuck, I'm human. I actually understand. And yes, those little things come in and

For me, I'm the same way.

Like I, you know, you think about Comparison is the

thief of joy. Remember? Yeah.

Um, even for me, I've actually made a reel this morning. I was like the mentor you think you're getting and it's me all professional. And then it's like, A whole bunch of videos of me just being a dickhead, like, because there's been, I was sick a couple of weeks ago and I'm like in bed like this with my earplugs and then my client gets on.

I'm like, really, sorry, I'm really sick, but I'm here and I love you. And I'm like, sometimes I think, Ooh, am I being professional enough? And I'm like, and I was like, you're getting me in my rawest form, which is my most inspired form. And you're going to get the best out of me and I'm going to do everything for you.

But. It's, it's a different version because I don't want to work with a million people. Yeah. I want to work with the people that lady may be

feeling sick as well sometimes. And then she may feel like she can't get online with you because she's not being professional, but yeah, they all think they need to show up like, yeah, and I'm like,

like, please don't show up done.

Like just come as you are, you know, like. I feel like singing some silver chair right then as a friend, um, not silver chair. Is it? It's Nirvana. Nirvana. Sorry. Nirvana. I said it as soon as I said it. Calm down. Calm down. Kurt Cobain is rolling in his grave. I

have no idea who you're talking about, so

that's just like, that's okay.

Um, but yeah, I think that that rawness and the vulnerability of being like, this is actually what it looks like. Yeah. And. Fuck, there's going to be that many people cheering for you when you get to that, everyone's going to be like,

yes queen! You actually will need to have a party. Yeah.

Yeah, we do. We do.

Cause a lot of people, that's the thing as well. A lot of people that have been like, I've been cheering you on from the sidelines and it's nice to know that people are going through the same thing. Yeah. And you don't feel so alone and isolated. Cause that's, I did, I felt so like, Oh my God. Does anyone have this?

Yeah.

And

then you feel like you're failing. And then, yeah, once I spoke about it, so many more people would be more like saying to me, Oh my God, I've got this. And I'm like, I feel you. I understand. And it's hard. And you just feel

inspiring. Like other people feel like inspired. I can, I felt the same in everything that I've gone through personally.

I'm like, You know, other people are going to be like, okay, I can do things. I can change. It's like the light at

the end of the tunnel. Like it's come, it's you'll get there and it's nice. It's nice to be inspiring from a raw. From a raw like place, it's not like, you know, you're not putting on this front of like, you know, someone may be complimenting on you or something that you're being fake in.

Whereas when you're being real and raw and someone compliments you and it's like, you know, you feel so you're like, Oh, it's good. We're good. We're nice. It just feels nice.

Yeah. You actually feel sane. You feel hugged. Yeah. I think it's been really good to look at like where you've come from with your journey with your tax debt.

But I think. We also really need to look at like the amazing ways that you've grown in your business, you know, like, because you've had so much growth, so much happening as a leader and as a business owner. And that's something that you guys have been sort of working on as well. So let's talk about some of that stuff.

Jen's working together again. Jen's talking about heartbreak. Oh, Oh, I'm talking a little bit about like that we are in a focus at the moment of letting go. So there's that. Letting go. Peace. And that little bit of heartbreak and a little bit of moving on and change. 'cause change is,

and I think from always happening, I can, so I can say this so easily, looking from the outside in, but, and Cherrel will be able to do the same, but when you're in it, you feel like, yeah.

You feel so

different. Yeah. .

So Sherell and I have both had, um, staff members leave our business in the last, um, couple of months and both go out on their own. Mm-Hmm. . Um, and. You definitely look internally and you're like, how was I not enough? How could I have done more? How could I, is this my fault? Is this, am I doing something differently?

And

the first thing you do is go back to yourself and you blame yourself and you go, am I not doing enough? Was I, yeah.

And it's so easy from the outside. Jen can do the same with me. It's so easy from the outside that anyone's looking in going, you're an idiot. You do as much and you're all in compensating and turn it around.

Yeah, I know. I've got to

turn it around and I can

do it with Shirelle and you can do it with me. And I know for so long, like we worked. Like Sherelle's culture is so beautiful within her walls with her people that she works with. And you know, I feel like super proud that I've got to be a part of that journey and watch her become this beautiful leader that I think what we have to remember is it's not about us.

You know, it can be about us. It can be about, you know, you can watch businesses that have this constant turnover and it is about us, but it's not about us. And we've got to get. okay with that and still keep, you know, after that little heartache, still keep It's showing back up and being like, yeah,

but even, I think even if you do have that moment and that reflection where you're like, Oh, maybe it was about me, but where do you take it from there?

Are you going to spiral down or are you going to go like, Oh, okay, maybe I did do that. Let me work on this. What can I do? To change that, you know, like it's an opportunity. Interesting enough, I think

it's a real talk out point too, because you came, you come to me straight away and I go to Jen. So, and you know, because Jen and I are mentoring business, Jen mentors me quite often cause she knows me so well that I'll go to Jen and I'll be like, I.

I'm failing. What am I doing? Have I done this? Have I made the right choice? And Jen will talk me through it. And Jen's like, yes. And Jen doesn't, if Jen doesn't think it's the right choice, Jen doesn't tell me, she will help talk me through it, but she'll be like, okay, let's break this down. Where are you at?

Where's your head at? Where are you going? And Jen and I do this all the time. In all our programs,

in everything. I think that allows you that. Space to pause and remove yourself from the emotion that you're feeling. Cause you do straight away. You feel right into, well, it goes straight into your heart, isn't it?

Straight to your heart. So it's like, let's just. You just cool it for a second there little guy, let's just use this for a minute and just really get what's, what's really happening and what, or what am I creating in my head? Or yeah.

What wounds are currently generally it's wounds. What wounds is, is currently bringing up that you're like, how, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

And there's wounds for me. There's wounds for you. And. And then, yeah, pulling us back and, you know, you and I've had good conversations about processes and things like that, that we do to move through this and to be okay with this. And, you know, we were having a voice note back and forth the other day about certain things and, you know, I think it's really important and it's graceful part too.

It's like, who do we actually want to talk to? Be as leaders when we are feeling a little wounded and it's, it's grace. It's always grace. And for me it's always grace because somebody else is on their journey and I are, you gonna feel really, really proud of, you know, how you've led that person and how you've, you know, loved them and how you've, and just feel really grateful that that's their journey or are you gonna get and inspire them

to be able to go and take that step on their own.

Yeah. You know,

always. Because if, if you haven't provided that foundation won't, it's always like, it's. It's always going to be hard. It's always going to watch clients leave. You're always going to feel wounded. And it's like, what steps do you take at that point to help guard your heart? Because you know, it's not somebody doing it to you.

It's their own journey, but people forget when they don't have, when they haven't gone through it. Like how. Hard it can be from the other side and I know it's not intentional when they, when they do it. I think it's like, I think it's their journey and it's not intentional, but watching it from the other side can be really painful.

So it's like what safeguards for me, I mute a lot of things. I'm off social media a lot now, so that's actually really, really helpful for me. Um, but yeah, it's, It has been a big journey. So how are you feeling?

I feel, I don't even know how I feel, honestly. I feel if we're talking all things like staff members and letting go of that, that has been really hurtful and really, but again, like you said as well, it's like, Um, and then I think at the same time it's their journey and they're on, they're kind of thinking about themselves.

But because you put so much work and so much effort and so much love and so much compassion into that, you know, it does hurt. It does feel really sad. One of the hardest things that we, we

spoke about that is one of the hardest things about a business owner and anyone that has had staff can understand this is.

There's so much, um, secrecy that goes in the background, generally, before someone takes that step. So it's getting to the point of once they've taken that step, you knowing that there's a full Disclosure. There's like a, no, there's

a line of like.

All of the stuff that has to go in the background for them to set themselves up that's behind your back that you feel then really like.

Betrayed. Yeah. I, that's the word I would use is I, the, yeah, I feel betrayed.

Yeah. Because the, you know, that there's a lot for most people, not all cases. Jen, full disclosure for about 25 years. I did. Yeah. You're like, this is nothing. Hey, I bought a basin today. Yeah. Hey, I

got a basin plumbed in today.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Literally every step. Um, and also it was funny. We were talking, Rich and I were talking about this the other day, you know, if, you know, how would you feel like we're looking at a different thing right now with, you know, I can't, I'm not gonna, oh, yeah. We can't say it, but Yes. But Richard said like, how would you feel if this happened to you?

Like, Jen left your salon and took clients. And I was like, oh, funny enough, Jen and I discussed Yeah, most clients that she took.

Mm.

Um, and even when things got sticky, we communicated through it and stuff like that. It was always gonna be different. It's my best friend, but it's, yeah, it is. And I understand why.

Yeah. Like I do understand why their secrecy Yeah. They've gotta set themselves up. I understand that. But when it all comes out. It gets really,

like, it feels hard. I think it depends how that situation has been handled though.

Yeah.

Because. If you go into that situation, and I can speak to this because obviously I did it, if you go into that situation with integrity, knowing that however that comes out on the other side has been done with integrity, then it shouldn't feel sneaky.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Agreed.

You know what I mean?

Yeah. Agreed. Um. But yeah, I think that it's also how you take it. I, as I said, I'm friends with every single person that's left the business because I've understood different journeys along the way. Um, but it's still regardless of whether I'm close to everyone, there's still been definitely hurts.

Yeah. Things along the way. And you've just got to be like, okay, where are my learning points in here? What is have hurt me before, but also when I, when it comes to you. Your, um, focus on, please be honest, please tell me please. You know, was, yeah. That was the biggest thing. That was the biggest thing for you.

So when it didn't go that way, it's also the biggest heartache.

Yeah. Yeah. The, the one thing that you're asked for, and then it doesn't, like, it's very, very simple. And then when it doesn't get done, or when it doesn't get held with, you know, honesty.

Yeah.

That's where the hurt comes from. It's like, I, you know,

So then what steps do you take so that this doesn't become a wound?

Like, what are the things that you're putting in place? That's

the thing as well. It's like, I feel like you can still ask for honesty and you know, you're always asked, like, that's all I ask for is honesty. It's kind of in the other person's hand if they want to be honest with you or if they, you know, that's how I felt.

I was like, what else can I do to not have this happen again?

We, I think it comes a bit personal. So Shirelle and I have worked through different things together that where that I'm like, okay, this is what I want you to do. This is how I want you to start to release things. And, um, even Shirelle said the other day, I feel like I'm a little bit like numb to it.

All

I have desensitized.

And I was like that, okay, I need you to get back into it. Well, that's

part of a grieving process.

Cause that was me. I feel like if

sure, I was just like, that's done, done. Don't want to talk about it ever again. And I was like, no, this is not what we're doing because then we can't help to like ease through the wound.

I love that Sims nodding her head in the background. This doesn't help the wound. And we also like, I, so when it happened, I remember saying, sure. I was like, I like. You know, before everything kind of happened, the first conversation, she was like, everything is great. Blah, blah, blah. This is how it's happening.

I'm great. I'm great. I'm great. And I was like, okay, you just said too many times. No, no, no. She was, she was, I was just like, I was good. Okay. This is how you're going to feel today. I am just warning you. That this is a big process now, and this is not how you'll feel the whole time. And I'm wanting you for when this happens so that you're prepared.

And then, yeah, I got another phone call and it was like,

and I was like, I told you, I fucking told you I went on this big rollercoaster of emotions and I was like, and that's okay. Cause as

you said, you're grieving things, you're grieving how things were, but. Uh, also when you get out, like sometimes you're like, fuck, I wish there was a crystal ball and I wish there was perspective because we always go, we always, uh, it's always the darkest before the dawn.

We always go through these really tough times for us to bloom out the other side. But when we're in it, it's like, this is sticky and this is hard. And I don't know why this is happening or what I'm going through. Fuck. This is me and my relationship. And then I admit. My dream boat, but you just don't know why you're in it at all times.

And then it kind of blooms out the other side and you're like, Oh, such a gift. And then you can see that person for the absolute gift they were, but it's just hard when you're going through it. The thing that you said

before that worries me.

Is

what can I do?

This is when her

fucking therapy comes.

Welcome

to Jen's therapy session. Go Jen, she's going to be doing this to me too. The thing that worries me is when you said, what can I do so that this doesn't happen again? Nothing.

That's the thing. You can't do anything. Yeah. I feel like I'm doing the most. And I feel like I've gotten to like, you and I have gotten me to a stage where I'm like, okay, this is like, this is me up front.

Like just up front and like, tell me, put everything, it comes down to the tax again, like, you know, put everything on the table so that there's nothing that's hidden and then you just have to. Go through it. And you have to

like, you do have to learn that it is a business and nobody owes you their loyalty.

And that's the hard thing is because as a business owner, you put your people become such friends, like, and they are friends with us too. Don't get me wrong. Like it's a friendship on

all sides, but I think

there

was, but there's still, what was that quote that, um, J no, this morning, uh, uh, It needs to feel, um, it needs to be reciprocal, you know, it needs to be, yeah, it's a two way street.

So if it's feeling all like everything's going in and nothing's coming out, you know, it's if you're maintaining that reciprocal relationship, I think then it wouldn't feel correct me if I'm wrong, but it wouldn't feel so much like, well, I've done all of this and now you're leaving me.

Yeah. Again, that comes down to the grace part on both sides.

Um,

and I'm not saying this. From even for me now, I have been in business 15 years. I've had many people leave my business and. It's really hard still not to feel like the sky's going to fall like it really is because

you put so much into your business is your business. Yeah.

And we were having this discussion.

We had the podcast before this one, when we were talking to, um, Amy and Emily, Emily and their business owners, they're not on the floor. So they've created that amazing business that they actually able to step back a little bit from. And I said, it's really hard being an owner operator, because your heart is your business.

This business and learning as a leader to remove your heart from the middle of that space, because you can still lead heart led and it not be your identity. And then things get a little easier for you to handle. And I definitely think that's what has happened for me over time is I've been able to remove, you know, That little bit of this is not what defines me, whereas it's really easy to get into that space of this is what this business is.

What defines me?

Are you feeling separate from your business now? Do you feel like your business is what defines you? Is that that eat, you know, how we talked about that ego, this has definitely

led to more of that.

I reckon leadership. Yeah. At the moment. That's what I feel like I'm in a bit of a transitional phase at the moment because I feel.

Um, I feel like I'm in a bit of a fight or flight mode at the moment, but I know that I just see that again, the light at the end of the tunnel where it's going to be so good. And I know where things are going. It's just getting there. I'm just in that like,

I think from the outside for so long, it has been this duo and it was like this, this, this, this, this, and now, and Shirelle has always, always, always wanted to be able to step back a little bit, work on the education and lead, right.

Yeah. So with this, with this change, she's got these two beautiful new humans, and then she's also got this beautiful team around. So she's got four, four now that are working with her, that she's wanted this leadership role for so long that she hasn't been able to take. Because it's just been a duo and she's been work, work, work.

So by now we're in this different life, right? We're in this different step of where her business sits and her leadership. And this is where she's wanted to go, but hasn't been able to. So then you start to see the gift in this, right? Cause you're like, okay, this is where I want it to go. Plus you get to lead differently.

When you have new humans, you get to like, step into this new version of you and be like, okay. Yeah. I am the, I am operating differently. It's really hard when you decide to operate differently and not everyone's on board with that operation because they're used to the original. Put a

little bit of a roadblock in there as well.

So are you feeling that, like, are you feeling that now that transition to be? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I feel a lot better. Like I feel when I, and they always say when, when a door closes, another one opens more like it's exactly, it's so right. And so true. This has to happen for me to also grow because without that happening, I don't think I would have grown.

So then you get

to see the joy in the end of it, right? You get to go, Alright, even though this is feeling, this was hard and it was sticky and it was, you know, once you get out the other side, you're able to kind of, and this is why I think, Sure. Elle's been a little bit blocked off to it is because just get through it, get through it, get through it.

And once you kind of come out the other side, you're like, Ooh, I can see every lesson in that. And then it's really easy for me to be like, thank you.

I've put my business first and I've made sure that as long as the business is okay, I'll worry about me later. I worry about my feelings, my emotional feelings, which is

why mama's trying to do that with her now.

Yeah.

But for me, I needed to make sure because it comes back to trauma as well. It comes back to this business is how I make my money. This is how I support myself. This is how I don't have anyone to fall back on this. This is it. Yeah. This is it. If the business isn't running properly. I I don't have a house.

So this is, I think this

is what it comes down to, right? And I think you have hit the nail on the head. This is what it comes down to for all businesses. Our businesses are what physically support our lives. So what happens is, is there is a threat of it failing, you failing, it failing, fight or flight. So you go into the, so as a business owner, you're like, so even though you're like, I want to support, I want to help, and I want to guide because they're doing theirs.

There's a chance that yours might fail because of it. So you go into full fight because you're like, If this fails, I'm fucked. This is actually what keeps me afloat. And what, so you go into this like, which also helps to elevate you up because you get this kick in your ass to change it. But at the same time, I think it's, it's the underlying thing of it for anyone, any staff member, I guess, who's listening to this, it's that's left.

It's not because you've left it's because this, the owner is terrified that they will. It will hurt, like, their, their ability to take care of the humans. Like, and that is the bottom line of it is my business going to fail is like, if this happens bottom line, it's like security. And so you are already heightened because you're like, I'm about to have to do this.

like one of my going to what's gonna happen is something happens. Yeah. Because these businesses support our lives, you know, and we don't have employees. Like we, we aren't employees. We're the ones that are driving it. So our paychecks are the ones that get affected. And that's the scariest bit. Nothing stops for us.

The expenses don't stop the, You know, all the bills are still coming in or everything. And then if the business depletes, you're like, Holy fuck, what's going to happen. So that's why we go into this fight or flight mode where everything, because, because we're just taking it all in and going, how, how do I fucking damage control this?

Yeah, exactly. That's why I desensitized from it because it was just, okay. Miss slash comes first right now and then I'll deal with Cherelle.

Yeah.

And then, yeah, that just needs to be keep like, that just needs to keep

Yep.

But

what

about Charelle?

She will, I will get to her.

We've had

voice notes all week. Don't worry.

We're back. We're back. Cause for a while we weren't working together.

Oh, we're really, we've never not worked

together. Yeah. We've never not worked together. We're always in contact, but I'm in a full, like we're in a full program now. And I think this is perfect for what, what we've got going.

Like the evolution. It's sorry. The funny,

the other day, Cheryl's like, I need you. Let's catch up. And I was like, 100%. I was like, how about you come to my house? Cause my schedules. So fucking hectic. We just

make it work.

And I was, come to my house. On a Friday, I've got the baby, like, just come over. So she comes over and like, while I was in the background, we walked to the fucking cafe.

We're just like throwing chips at the baby to shut him up. And we both walked away. It was like one hour. That was it was like, get in, get out. And we just talked, had coffee, just chatted and she left. And that's when I built a new program because I was just like, Oh my God, I'm so inspired by this. But a little, and I just wrote a full program, which eventually will develop.

Um, but Cheryl was the same way. She was like, ah, this is exactly what I needed. And I was like, this is what I needed to inspire me and to make me develop as well, because like you and I've said, I never know what the process of What I've done is behind it. So sometimes being able to speak someone else through it is being, you know, the biggest joy.

So for me, I learn as much. As Shirelle learns when we're doing stuff together, because it's like, all right, go, what are we doing?

What do we got today? Yeah.

But yes, we're in a new program at the moment you're in culture at the moment with me. And it's more so just, you know, setting those things up, redefining what things look like, what's your purpose, where's your why, what's your, you know, where are you focusing and on all of those things.

So, I mean,

we've spoken about that in an earlier podcast, ironically one that's airing today. Um, Transcribed Um, but when you're in those sticky moments, when it, you know, you're in fight or flight or you are just feeling like you're in that last kilometer of the marathon, those are the things that will keep you going.

So you have to revisit it all the time to really feel clear why you were doing it. You know, why are you doing it?

And I think as well, because we wear so many hats in the business. We nearly forget. So we do need to be reminded of all these little things. Cause there's so many little things that goes into so many different categories, but because we've got so much information, we do forget.

So it's nice to be reminded.

A hundred percent. I don't want to put you on the spot, but I'm going to, what's your why? We're developing. We did this

my why? So the reason

I actually, I was just like, ah, and I was like, this is your why?

It is, you know me Well, my reason why is I want to create freedom. I want to create freedom for myself.

I want to create freedom for my future. I want to be able to travel with Owen, my partner. I want to be able to create a family and just not have to. Be stressed. Like I'm always going to, obviously there's always going to be that little type of stress when you're running a business, because you always want things to be great, but I want to make sure that I set myself up and my family for freedom and to live a really happy and good free life.

Excellent. What is the purpose of your business?

The purpose of my business is to create this just love community where someone comes into the salon and they may feel like shit, they may feel not the best. And we just turn that around. We put our good energy, our good vibes, we give them amazing lashes, we give them amazing brows, and we send them out feeling a complete different person.

Yes.

And that in itself is like, that's what makes. Us do what we do because I just love it. Like someone could come in and have a really shitty day. And then I'm like, Hey babe, like, what are you doing? Oh my God. Tell me about everything. And then I give them stunning brows and they leave and they're like, Oh my God, my life is so much better.

And I'm like,

life is always better with good brows.

And to remember your why and remember your purpose in these times of hard is So powerful because sometimes it gets to those burn it down moments. Like you're just like, why am I doing this? And also like letting it out, you know, it's funny. Um, Um, everything was feeling really hard a few weeks ago for me and it was just, it was, I was sick.

I just moved house, both the businesses and everything. And Richard and I had a conversation actually. And I just like cried through a lot of it and then just like yelled at him for some things and he was like, okay, well this, this, and this, and, and I was just like, it's too much and blah, blah, blah. And then literally like, Within a day, I was like, my fire was back.

Like I just needed to let it out. And you do that with me. Like, sometimes you just need to be like, and like all of like, you know, I have never been on the socials as much and, you know, it doesn't matter how much. Inspiration you get. Like I could have had the most incredible mentors around me at the time to try and inspire me.

It would have done nothing. I needed to let out the wound that I had to be like, here's all of it out. Like, this is how I actually feel. It was an exorcism. It was an exorcism like, and it wasn't even expected exorcism. But after I did it, Richard's was now going to ring me and be like, can you just like go crazy for a little bit and you'll get your spark that, um, but I needed to let it all out and be like, okay.

You need to make room. Now I

have room for other things and now I can move and, you know, I'm inspired again and to move and to do stuff and, but it's also, it's such a self journey as well, you know, seeing like doing therapy and, um, different types of therapy and seeing different types of people. Huge.

Massive. I was in therapy for like two years and it's not, I think I'd actually like to talk on this because I think therapy is this whole thing about you've got to be fucked up to be, you know, going to therapy or you've got to be, there's something wrong with you. You've got to have had a

world's most traumatic day.

Childhood therapy is about learning. You have had

the world's most traumatic childhood. Please do get therapy. Carry on. Yeah,

no, but I just think everybody should know, but we think we like, I remember my sister saying this once, like, why would I do it? I haven't. Yes. Why would I do it? Because I haven't had any big trauma.

It's everybody. Yeah. Regardless of trauma. I

could get so high on this. But it's not about that. It's actually about like learning about yourself and why you do things. And the way that you

respond to the environment that is around you and the things that you're presented with and how to build a toolkit so that you can move forward in those situations.

I also think I'm going to put this out there and it's going to sound a little woo woo, but just go with me here. Um, I think for anyone that's like, what should I be doing? Fucking just ask the man upstairs, the universe, whoever it is that you call to, to send you to the people. Because someone will come along and be like, Oh, I saw this person the other day.

And you will be like, Holy fuck. That was, that was who I was meant to say. So sit, reflect on it, journal on it. Ask whoever you are calling to is like, send me where I need to go right now. Because. My cranial sacral therapist that I saw just was a random conversation with my best friend who her auntie saw.

And he's just made me see things really differently. But at the same time, I was seeing a clinical therapist. So then she would make me see things differently as well. And I really think I can say that to you. I really think I'm quite different. In the last four months, even three months of where my brain goes with things and the things that I've decided, I'm no longer trying to fix myself.

And therapy's actually helped me with that. Like I was very much like, Oh, close the door on that done. And now I realize,

which

is why I'm approaching you at the moment. Um, and I realized that that is not healthy, nor it is not going, I can't close the door and just hope it will never happen again. And I think for me, it's just like.

And, you know, the cranial therapist is very much like, he, like, I'm like, tell me how to fix it. And he's like, it doesn't work like that. Like, he's like a start trying to fix yourself. And as I've set, sat back with myself and really like listened into those things, I'm like, Holy fuck. I know the answers in this, but I need the guidance of the people trying to guide me through this.

And everybody knows the answer. Yeah. It's

just having that, the steps to bring it out. Even

for me, socials. Like I was just like. You know, once coming off. So like that was just, uh, and it just took some time to like process in my head. And I'm like, Oh fuck, this is where I'm meant to be. Okay. That's cool. I understand that.

I know, I

know that. Are you comfortable talking about what you were seeing a therapist for?

Yeah. Oh my God. Yeah. I went through, I feel like I went through a lot of traumatic events, not a lot. Obviously there's a lot of people that have gone through a lot worse, but myself was my childhood, my trauma with my mom.

I haven't spoken to my mom in like. 10 years. And then Devi, me, my, me and my creative director were talking about it the other day is, uh, today was. People don't really speak about DV that much and going through trauma with that. Cause that was also a huge thing. So just, I don't know, I think I felt I needed to speak about it because with that being like, no, I need to like, there's desensitization towards that.

I needed to get through that for me to continue to actually like, you know, live my life and have kids. And I

think that's why the new boyfriend, that's why the ego was up. So the ego was up to protect. That's true. Shell against what that was. De desensitize, put my ego up, pretend everything is good and everything will look great from the outside, even though I'm crumbling.

Yeah.

Mm.

So taking That's so true. That away she and us working through different things of business as well, she was able to soften and become, because people look at Shell Rell now, she a, you look at her and you go, how is she the kindest, sweetest, most loving, supportive, wonderful human. And she's been through this and now she lets that really show.

Yeah. Yeah.

You have to go through all that and God it's, it does suck and it's not easy. Like it's, you know, it's horrible. It's

really commendable of you to recognize that because there are so many people that will not. Face up to that, you know, like, what do we say? Like, look into the fire. Mm-Hmm. And and same thing with your business, babe.

Yeah. Sometimes you have to like literally look at the fire. Yeah. And that really impacts their ability to have future relationships. Yeah.

And I think that was a big thing is like the problems that were very heavy and like the stuff with my mom and the dv with my ex-boyfriend, that, that thing had to, I had to look into that and go, okay.

I really need to work on this to get through it. It's like with my tax, I needed to come to terms with, okay, I have 200 K worth of debt. I need to look into it and I need to work through it so we can get past it and not have to worry about it in the future. In the long run. So it's personally and it's facing the fire.

Yeah. It's facing the fire personally. And I think too,

like we've heard like many times before, do you, do you want to fight for your place in the mud? Like, do you want to stay there and stick, stick in the mud and just live it? Or do you want to get out of it? Like it's time to face it. And if I can say that to everybody, like, Start to face it, just sit and journal what is, what is some things that I'm not facing right now.

I can do it. We can all do it. I could write shit loads right now. You could do the same. What are the things that are not facing right now? And please someone upstairs. Tell me not from this up higher, tell me, or give me the resources in the apartment. Upstairs is going to tell us someone good Lord universe, whoever is your human or whoever is your being, but.

But you know, send me pray for that. Send me the people that you know, if, if that's your first journey, just start to Google it, start to get involved with people, start to ask around, start to have these brave conversations. It's really, really, really cool to start having that. And you know, I've watched my partner face the fire and we were having conversations about it last night.

I've watched him go through his fire and face it. You know, live through it and have to live through his choices, but be able to come out the other side. And he's the most extraordinary man, the most extraordinary man. And he was like, I haven't been this man in a really long time. Whereas for me, I'm like, I don't understand you have always, you, you are this person, but he's done so much work to get here.

And it's from the people and asking and sharing his story and being vulnerable and you know, it's yeah, it's been magic to watch, you know, even his group of friends are like, I can't believe. Like you so different because he's back in his body, but that doesn't just, there's trauma behind why you weren't in your body and why you weren't being the person that you know you can be.

And the only way through is to ask for help and to get it.

The sooner that you do that, the sooner that it becomes better as well. Cause it's like that, that first step is the hardest step. It's like with anything to start something, it's, it's the hardest thing is to start it to do it. And it's so simple, but it's so hard.

So. both again in business and personal, you kind of need to just start. And this, the sooner you start it, the better it'll be.

Yeah. I think it's probably going to be one that we need to do at a later stage. Let's do an episode about the DV stuff.

Yeah, absolutely. I'd be happy to talk about it.

Because I think I can't say at the moment because of things But there will, I mean, cause I, I have been in multiple levels of domestic violence relationships as well, but I think that that whole message about coercive behavior that's just coming up at the moment is something that we really do need to address because

it's spoken about more.

Yeah,

it does. So we can definitely go deeper into that one at another time. Yeah. Yeah. Cause it needs to have more time dedicated to it. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I feel like women don't have that. Yeah. We'll talk about it more, but Oh my God, I could get so,

me too.

Yeah. So into it. The thing that I find the most that that helped my business grow is once I started working on me, my business, Yeah.

So much better. Like it just, because at the end of the day you start with your business as you, right? At the end of the day, your

business is a reflection of you, which is what my, the scene started there. It's reflected on every, when my businesses are hurting, it's generally cause I'm hurting and there's something going on with me.

So as I get me right, the businesses get right. So people think, no, I've just got to keep focusing, keep focusing. And I'm like, We need to go internal. And this is why so many of my programs start internally. That's what we need to go internal because if we don't go internal,

it's about the energetics as well.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. As you, yeah, 100 percent as you worked on you. And that's when we talk about, you know, breaking down the ego and coming into that. So that was the biggest thing

for me when I signed up with you for the first time, I not only changed my business. But myself as a person, like in the best way possible, like I was just such a better human for it.

Is this

like a Drew Barrymore moment? Like where I start

getting, like

we share the same

microphone? But honestly, don't make my hair gendered. Sorry,

I can fix it, I'm a hairdresser.

But honestly, like that's where I just felt like I, Cause I, it, it really made me look inside and you were like, you know, this starts with you as well.

You have to be good first. So

what's important to remember is like, and as you said, we haven't done work. We always been there. We became friends. But we haven't done work for ages, but I think what that's what people need to remember is working with me doesn't mean working with me full time. Like I'm just here.

And once I develop a relationship, I'm like, you're my human, you're always going to be my human call me anytime. Like, and you can pick up and. You're like, okay, I need something fresh. Let's go. But I also think the inspiration from like, sometimes when you're lacking, it's not only finding and talking your shit out, but finding people that make you feel inspired again, like, and it's not always me.

It's for other people. Like even the other day I sat down and listened to something that I had. A free masterclass that I listened to. And I was like, okay, I like that. I'm going to do that, you know? And I think that we need to search for inspiration outside of us because we need others to inspire us to be, to move and to move.

Yeah, absolutely.

Yeah, that's better. Do you guys need a room? And then we're getting married in Europe, um, Jen, would you like to be our celebrant? I will be the officiant. This is a friendship for

life.

This is what you get. You get a lot of love. Um, if you come to Celebrising, you're going to get a whole lot of, like, emotional smara that just, like, loves you and just wants to, yeah, be with you.

Hopefully a physical touch. Cause I'm so scared. My girl knows her love languages.

All right, guys, we're going to let these two get a room. We're going to wrap it up now. Thank you so much for coming back.

I feel so honored that I've been on here.

Man, a third time is coming. Yeah. Third time's coming. Uh, yeah.

Thanks so much for listening, everybody. And you'll hear more of this story soon. Love you. Thanks everyone. Bye. Love you guys. Bye.